Give thanks, y’all!

Take a second, if you will, to think of five things you’re thankful for. There’s no better time than now, so I’m hoping you’ll play along. If you’re like me, you can easily come up with five, and if yours involves your friends and family then I think we should be friends. Now, come up with five not-so-obvious, might-be-odd things that you’re thankful for, like a large McDonald’s Diet Coke, with the perfect ice and fat straw, or a decision by your dog to use you as a pillow. If you’re also thankful for these then I’m certain we should.

Seriously, gratitude is powerful! Research shows that It can improve our health and well-being, is good for relationships (at home and at work), allows us to experience positive emotions, increases our sense of belonging, and makes us more optimistic. It also helps us deal with adversity in times of trouble. Right on!

Train your Brain to See the Growth Not the Rain

Given the benefits of gratitude, it’s weird that we humans tend to focus on negative experiences over positive or neutral ones, even when the negative experiences are inconsequential. For example, we perceive negative news as more truthful; and we focus on what we have to give up, rather than what we gain when we set a goal. This is called the negativity bias. Our tendency to focus on the negative likely has evolution to thank. Historically speaking, those who focused on bad, negative, or dangerous threats were more likely to survive. Our brain has taught us to pay attention to these things to keep us safe. But, a focus on the negative can take its toll. It can affect relationships (e.g., expecting the worst from people), your decision-making and motivation (and the risks you’re willing to take), and your health (it’s been found to be associated with depression and a sense of hopelessness). Just one negative event can impact our mental and physical health (you ever replay a “stupid” comment you’ve made over and over in your mind? It can be debilitating).

The good news is that by focusing on gratitude we can overcome this bias and shift our mindset from negative to positive —yanno, accentuate the positive, and eliminate the negative. The benefits can result from expressing gratitude for big events (a friend helping you move) to smaller ones (finding forgotten money in your suit jacket) and it’s relatively easy and pretty darned effective in bringing about positive change — It’s a low-effort high-impact practice, so why not give it a go?

It doesn’t matter if you’re a Tigger or an Eeyore

Whether you’re a pessimist like Eeyore (“I never get my hopes up, so I never get let down”) or eternally optimistic, like Tigger, you can develop a positive outlook on life by practicing gratitude. Practicing gratitude influences happiness by:

• counteracting our brain’s tendency to focus on the negative.

• helping us become more optimistic. “I am grateful for so many things — my education, warm biscuits, my bed, smooth roads. I think life will just keep on getting better and better.”

• boosting our self-esteem. When we stop to appreciate what we have, we are more confident and more likely to perceive our value.

• increasing our empathy. Showing an appreciation for others’ contributions can help us feel connected and empathetic.

• changing the neural structures in the brain — making us more content.

• increasing our spirituality and connection with a higher power.

• reducing negative feelings, such as anger, bitterness, and envy as we appreciate the things we have that make us happy.

The Science of Gratitude

Understanding how gratitude has been characterized and studied may help explain how it impacts happiness and well-being (see Science Bit for more detail).

• Gratitude can be a trait (or the degree to which a person has a naturally grateful personality), a mood (which can fluctuate daily); or an emotion, which describes a passing feeling of gratitude (when you receive a compliment, you may feel a positive emotion).

• Gratitude is a two-step process: (1) becoming aware that you have experienced something positive and (2) recognizing that the source of this experience is external (from another person, fate, divine intervention).

• The benefits of practicing gratitude won’t happen overnight. Research has found that gratitude can have a positive impact in 3-10 weeks of consistent practice (see suggestions below).

• Research suggests that the practice of reflecting on and expressing gratitude can have lasting effects.

Exercise your gratitude muscle. This practice will have you thanking the coffee pot for brewing your morning cup of joe. It may feel a bit contrived or silly at first, but I promise (and so do a slew of researchers) that your ability to think gratefully will grow stronger with practice. And, your happiness and well-being will expand in a similar fashion.

1. Journal your Gratitude. I am not a big fan of journaling (my hands cramp). If you’re not one to enjoy taking pen to page, journal in your notes section on your phone — easier still, speak them into existence using your phone’s voice recorder.

2. Mentally Thank Someone, Something, or the Universe. Devote 1 or 2 minutes of your day to think about what you’re grateful for. Put it on your to-do list if you have one. These practices will make you change the way that you think and perceive the world. Ultimately, with practice, you’ll start thinking this way naturally.

3. Write a Gratitude Letter “Dear Susan, Thank you for the schnitzel.” These letters work, even if you don’t send them.

4. Play Angel’s Advocate. Reimagine your frustrations (e.g., having to drive back to work at the end of your day because you forgot something) as opportunities (this gives me a chance to listen to the end of the Yankees game) and show appreciation. I challenge myself to do this often (e.g., “I am thankful that the shower water has turned cold, so I won’t dilly-dally”).

5. Meditate and Pray. If you’re religious, use some/most of your meditation and praying time to cultivate gratitude.

6. Spread Gratitude on Your Social Media Platforms. In fact, let’s start a movement to spread the good. #appreciatethegood #grattitude #gratitudeforthewin #attitudeofgratitude